New Instagram Bios by Jot Chahal


#imjot #ranachahal #iloverana #ijotc 

#ranaralla #Instagram #ijotrana #jot #rana #ranjotsinghchahal 

Dream big (tiny font)

    • Eating a whole apple core because you can’t be bothered going to the bin, admit it, you’ve done it.
    • Every storm runs out of rain
    • Fabulous ends in “us” coincidence? I think not
    • Generally, the path of least resistance appeals. Also, I am excellent at parallel parking.
    • God bless this hot mess
    • Good Samaritan, washed-up athlete, especially gifted napper.
    • Have lots of hair and like ugly things
    • Here to serve…. the cat overlord
    • I absolutely hate Instagram, and anything else having to do with hashtags.
    • I always feel sad for seedless watermelons, because what if they wanted babies?
    • I am an actor and a writer and I co-created my breakfast and my son, Malachai.
    • I am coming back to face the reality that a normal day is not beer on the beach or calamari in the belly.
    • I can quote (Insert movie) better than you and all your friends.
    • I Can’t remember who I stole my bio from or why
    • I have not lost my mind – it’s backed up on HD somewhere.
    • I have this new theory that human adolescence doesn’t end until your early thirties.
    • I hope one day I love something the way women in commercials love yogurt
    • I looked at my Instagram photos and realized I look beautiful.
    • I once sneezed a beanie weenie through my nose. I also made a horse faint in Costa Rica.
    • I only rap caucasionally
    • I prefer my puns intended
    • I put the hot in psychotic
    • I recently gave up Warcraft so my productivity, and drinking, have increased dramatically.
    • I shouldn’t be allowed to go on Snapchat, Facebook or Instagram when I’m drunk!

I still don’t understand Twitter, but here I am.

    • I talk like a baby and I never pay for drinks.
    • I think it’s weird if a girl doesn’t have an Instagram now days.
    • I used to act. I also belly dance and eat Jolly Ranchers – not always at the same time though.
    • I was addicted to hokey pokey but I turned myself around
    • I will go into survival mode if tickled
    • I’m a force to be reckoned with, I reckon
    • I’m not glad it’s “Friday” I’m glad it’s “Today”. Love your life 7 days a week.
    • I’m starting to like Instagram, which is weird because I hate pictures.
    • I’ve always thought being popular on Instagram is as about as useless as being rich in monopoly
    • I’m a Basset Hound aficionado with a mouth like a Syphilitic sailor.
    • I’m a Texan with lots of opinions and pretty hair.
    • I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I am joking.
    • I’m here to avoid friends on Facebook.
    • I’m not smart. I just wear glasses.
    • I’m not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them
    • I’m real and I hope some of my followers are too.
    • I’m really a giant cupcake. Afraid of roller coasters and dry ice
    • If I could sum up my life in one line I would die of embarrassment
    • If you don’t have anything nice to say, come sit by me, and we can make fun of people together
    • In search of sleep, sanity, & The Shire
    • Insert pretentious stuff about myself here.
    • It’s Weird that all pics shared from Instagram are always blurring.

Just a cupcake looking for a stud muffin

    • Just another paper cut survivor
    • Just keep swimming
    • Life is dumb and I want to sleep
    • Living vicariously through myself
    • Making the Snuggie look good since 2009.
    • Mama said life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your gonna get
    • Mermaids don’t do homework
    • My hobbies are breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
    • My life is about as organized as the $5 DVD bin at Wal-Mart
    • My life was changed by a train.
    • Promo Codes for life.
    • My relationship status? Netflix, Oreos and sweatpants
    • Naturally and artificially flavored
    • Nice guys finish lunch.
    • Nothing more than a man who cared enough to try
    • Oh I’m sorry was my sass too much for you?
    • OMG no one cares
    • Only Swag girls are fascinated by hashtags on the Facebook.
    • Perfect has 7 letters and so does meeeeee. Coincidence? I think not.
    • Please insert pretentious crap about myself here.
    • Pour yourself a drink, put on some lipstick, and pull yourself together.
    • Probably the best meat eater in the world

Proud supporter of messy hair and sweatpants

    • Pudding tastes better with a plastic spoon
    • Putting’ the ‘elation’ in ‘Public Relations’
    • Recommended by 4 out of 5 people that recommend things.
    • Recovering ice cream addict
    • S P E C T A C U L A R V E R N A C U L A R
    • Someday, there’s going to be an updated version of me.
    • Sometimes I just want to give it all up and become a handsome billionaire.
    • Spreading smiles like they’re herpes
    • Stay classy
    • Super cali swagilistic hella dopeness
    • That awkward moment you get accepted to all the schools you applied for.
    • The bags under my eyes belong to kaya west
    • The fat on my body is designer
    • The only person on Instagram who doesn’t claim to be a social media guru.
    • The only thing stopping me from being pure white trash is my lack of motivation.
    • There shouldn’t be a fear of getting old. It’s the fear of not getting there that scares me.
    • There’s no such thing as darkness, just an absence of light
    • To infinity and beyond
    • Trying to elevate small talk to medium talk.
    • Where the hell am I, and how did I get here?
    • White lips, pale face, I hate the entire human race
    • Why look up at the stars when the biggest star is me

Will show ankle for five minutes of wireless

  • Winner of World’s Best Wife Award (Category: Nagging)
  • Words cannot express my love & passion for Fridays!
  • You can follow me if you feel like it. You can also put peanut butter in your butthole, if you feel like it.
  • You can’t fix stupid, no matter how much duct tape you use over their mouth!
  • You is kind, you is smart, you is important
  • You know your in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.
  • You’re too rad to be sad.
  • You’re a 10, on the pH scale, maybe. Cuz you’re basic

New Instagram Bios of 2016-17




    • Millennial and proud of it
    • Things just ain’t the same for gangstas
    • This is my simple Chipotle dependent life
    • Car, house, or trip to Thailand? Let’s pack our bags
    • The reason I like you is simple, love, laughter, and your smile
    • How we live our life is far more important than how we say we live our life
    • The best of me is yet to come
    • Making history
    • On a scale of 1 to 10, I’m a 15
    • Math: Mental Abuse To Humans
    • Let go and let the world pass through your fingertips
    • Is it bad I’m constantly craving either cupcakes or donuts?
    • BAE means bacon and eggs

  • When we met there was romance in the air, a sense of the world stopping still
  • I only use Instagram to stalk…
  • I’ve never been able to figure out this damn Twitter bio thing
  • I’m done with my dinner when I’ve had my dessert
  • This isn’t rocket science, you take a photo of brunch and you hashtag #yolo #sundayfunday
  • I haven’t been myself ever since I was born
  • This is my last Instagram bio ever
  • I wish I knew when my Dominos pizza would arrive
  • I’ve been waiting hours and I’ll be waiting for hours more, till my love arrives and my heart’s fulfilled
  • When I’m not on Instagram I’m on Netflix watching OITNB
  • Why would I ever leave the house when there’s Netflix and ice cream waiting for me
  • I do yoga sometimes, drink sometimes, party sometimes, and study rarely

New Instagram Bios of 2018



  • My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I’m right.
  • Recommended by 4 out of 5 people that recommend things.
  • Everything on this earth is self-centered, the difference is the radius.
  • I still don’t understand Instagram, but here I am!
  • I am so poor, I can’t even pay attention.
  • Can Bob the Builder fix my bad attitude?
  • I have not failed, my success is just postponed for some time.
  • One person’s LOL is another person’s WTF.
  • I will be back before you pronounce afjkhnfknluancakhufhjcnk.
  • Always give your 100%, unless you’re donating blood.
  • Life is too short to update Instagram bios.
  • I have good news and bad news to tell you. The bad news is that I don’t have any good news. The good news is that I don’t have any bad news.
  • Knowledge is like underwear, important to have, but not necessary to show off.
  • Wi-Fi, food, my bed. Perfection.
  • Hard work never killed anyone, but why take the chance?
  • Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe, one day, you’ll find a brain back there.
  • I don’t make mistakes. I date them.
  • Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
  • Due to an intense mind fog, all of my thoughts have been grounded until further notice.
  • I changed my password everywhere to ‘incorrect.’ That way, when I forget, it reminds me, ‘Your password is incorrect.’
  • The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep!
  • My mother told me not to talk to strangers. I never talk to myself, anymore.
  • I smile because I have no idea what’s going on.
  • The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
  • I hold the key to world piece, but somebody changed the lock!
  • I only drink on two occasions: when it’s my birthday and when it’s not.
  • Friendship is like peeing on yourself; everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.
  • Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
  • I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s